Seriously!
by gotosleepevilangel
Summary: I'm not interested in him, and I'm not making a claim on George. If anything I'm just..depressed and that can explain everything...right? Izzie Stevens what have you done? Izzies pov
1. Chapter 1 A Faux Pas

"Doesn't he have like, mcstuff to do or something?" I snapped when he came prancing through the door in his usual I'm-So-Full-Of-My-Self-Cause-I'm-Sexy manner. Christina looked at him nonchalantly before looking back at me with an eyebrow raised. "Someone's cranky" I glared before taking a bite of my apple and leaning against the wall with my eyebrows twisted in anger. Of course, he found us, all of us including his best pal the '_dirty mistress'_.

"Morning everyone, and of course I find you all lounging around. Don't you have patients?" His gravely voice _did not _make my knees feel weak. Instead I glared. "For your information… we, uh, everyone's living ok, don't you have somewhere else to be?" He just lifted his eyebrows, gave his breathtaking grin turned on his heel and sauntered off. I think he actually added a little swish to his step. I glared harder.

George stood in front of me his face slightly flushed with a little tick above his left eye. "What are you doing, you just mouthed off Sloan!" I just rolled my eyes. Meredith pushed herself away from the wall. "Don't mind Izzie George, she's just cranky. Anyways, I've got to go see Mr. Caplan and tell him his livers jaundiced" Christina picked up a patients chart and glanced at me and George before shaking her head and walking off with Meredith.

"Really though Izzie, why don't you like him?" he was running his hands over his arms and I glanced at him and couldn't help but giggle a little on the inside. He is truly adorable sometimes. Wait, did I just think George was adorable? Time to start baking again. Bailey came storming around the corner in her usual huff and still I wasn't bothered. Sloan was still gnawing at the inside of my brain, him and his stupid mcsteamy-ness.

"Really people! Stevens, throw out the apple and get in the pit. O'Malley you're wanted in surgery with Doctor Shepherd" I watched George fumble over his own excited feet as he ran toward surgery. I took another lazy bite out of my apple before looking at Bailey. Her eyes were boring straight through my head and she looked like shes imagining what my funeral would look like. She lifted and eyebrow "Don't make me say it again" I choked a little on my apple before running off in what I hoped to be the direction of the pit. I could hear her muttering about "God damn interns" when I ran around the corner.

* * *

"I think I've sutured a million arms today. A guy came in after falling over a baby carriage when he tried to steal some chicks purse, seriously. I wanted to poor rubbing alcohol on it and walk away" I grumbled, I seem to be grumbling a lot lately. Since Denny, my moods have taken a turn for the worst. Denny. My Denny. I looked away from Meredith and Christina, it's not like they're listening anyways. They never are. Only George was sitting there with a goofy grin plastered on his face. "A baby carriage? Really? Wow" I smiled at him and his face flushed a little.

"Really, he's handed over the divorce papers and she's signed. Its finally official. I have Mcdreamy, I should be happy right?"

_Of course you should be, but you can't be happy with anything now can you? _ Christina looked up from her patients chart and glanced around the table before answering her. I think sometimes even Christina thinks Meredith is addicted to depression, addicted to the drama, addicted to sex. "Well if he's leaving her then yah, you win Mcdreamy and you can both get over the do I love him? Do I love her stage"

Meredith gave a small glare at Christina before doing her tell tale sign that she was going to turn and ask what we thought. She sits up a little and repositions her body so that she encompasses the whole table, not just Christina in their own little world.

"What do you think Izzie?" I choked a little on my salad to keep myself from saying what I wanted to say. _You have the love of a good man, someone you supposedly love and I have no one. I'm broken on the inside and you want me to care about something so insignificant as your inability to commit? _

"Well he's here. Make the most of it while you have the chance" the silence at the table was profound, every one of them thinking about that time when my heart almost died along with him.

"Listen Izzie I'm sorry I-" I cut her off because I couldn't hear the same apology, the one she's made almost everyday when she doesn't realize in her own ignorance how self centered she's being. "Really it's ok, I'm fine I'm just saying yah you should be happy" I plastered a smile on my face and looked back at my salad then at George who was frowning at me. "really I'm fine George, it's ok" he didn't believe me but he'd drop it, he'll wait for me to open up to him. Christina took the cue and changed the subject.

"Well I'm off, I'm going to see if Burke needs any help in surgery today" she gave a little grin before rushing off. Meredith was quick to follow. " I better get to my patients before Bailey does" she rolled her eyes then left. I watched her go and felt the familiar rush of that seething anger. Sometimes I could hate her, sometimes I really do.

George was talking. "And then she threw her tray of food at me! So I got to leave to go change" I glanced at him and forced a laugh. Ah George he's everyone's favorite kicked puppy. He's my favorite kicked puppy.

And there goes another lunch.

* * *

I was coming down the stair case when I ran into _him. _This is everyone's favorite meeting place, why me, why lord must it be me. Sloan stopped two stairs below me, even there he seemed to be able to look right into my eyes without any trouble. "Ah miss Stevens, I've been thinking about you" I tried to side step him but he moved in my way. Seriously, what's wrong with this guy? "I was wondering, how did such a pretty thing become so bitter" He stood with his arm on the railing and took a step towards me, which I mirrored but backwards.

"Listen, like you pointed out earlier _Doctor _-you could almost choke on my sarcasm which of course gave me great pleasure- I have patients who need my attent-"

"Listen Izzie, I know you're heartbroken over Denny but it's time to get over it"

I sputtered at him. Get over it? _Get over it?_

I could feel my face flush, my fists clenched in fury and I almost punched him right there. Whos he lost, other then countless numbers of women to his own whoring tendencies? He wouldn't know love and loss and the pain that comes with it if it came up and smacked him in the face. Which I did. I pulled back and slapped Mark Sloan across his devilishly handsome face. He didn't even see it coming, his eyes widened and he took a step backwards still shocked. I looked at my hand then at him, the adrenaline was pulsing in my veins and here this man stood before me shocked and I smiled. It was the most amazing feeling ever, the first euphoric feeling I've had in ages.

The next thing I knew I was in his arms. His lips crushed against mine, my arms wrapped around his muscular torso. He was nibbling at my lips in almost angry desperation and I was crushing my body against his, grinding against him. I let out a sigh which he used to delve his tongue between my lips and explore. Dear God this man could kiss. It was passionate, it was hot molten fire burning in my veins.

I didn't know if he made me mad, or weak with passion. Maybe that's why he annoyed me so much. He pulled back sucking on my lips which only made me moan. Damn my lips would be bruised.

"You Izzie Stevens are a hell of a kisser"

"You're not so bad yourself Sloan" he cocked his eyebrow at me and rumbled out a chuckle. "Not bad? That's it?"

I smiled at him. "That's it"

"what do I have to do to turn that not bad into an oh my God you're the best thing that's ever happened to me"

"A lot more"

He smirked and I thanked God for having his arms around me because my knees went weak.

"We'll have to work on that"

And that's when my affair with Mark Sloan began.


	2. Chapter 2 Sweet Apathy

Chapter Two

Of course, once I realized that I might be getting into something and his lips began to move in hot passionate kisses up my neck, to my jaw line, my resolve kicked in. What the hell was I doing with Sloan, Mcsteamy of all people. Get with it. I'm probably the only girl in the hospital he hasn't screwed. Dammit Izzie what have you gotten yourself into. His lips had nibbled there way up my ear lobe when I remembered I was supposed to be pushing him off me.

"Sloan" a few seconds of no comprehension. "Sloan, get. Off."

He stopped his burning path and looked at me, the cold had leeched its way back into my voice. My annoyance from this morning was back full force and I remembered I didn't like this man.

"What's the problem"

"You, you are the problem"

He looked puzzled but he backed away, to the landing then stood by the door.

"I don't understand you Izzie. You're letting yourself rot in misery and here I am offering you a small out and you won't take it"

I glared. He saw my misery as a way to get into my pants.

"Why don't you go screw someone else Sloan, you're not getting your jollies off here"

He shook his head then left. I watched the door slowly close and then sat on the steps. My head dropped into my hands. I feel defeated. I want to be a doctor, I want to move on but _Sloan? _I think I might have reached some sort of insanity point. I should get it checked into. The door burst open and George came stumbling through with Callie into the landing. The moment the door closed they threw themselves at each other, groping and kissing and I stared in small horror. Not at the scene but at the jealousy that came raging through the thin veil I had created around myself. I was jealous? Over George?

What does that mean? Callie noticed me first and sputtered around Georges mouth who still had no clue. I found myself inspecting his mouth. It was soft and kissable, he had nice kissable lips. How many times had I stared at his mouth without thinking about how I'd like to just kiss it? Why hadn't I noticed before?

"Uh George…we have company"

I stood up, plastered the smile on my face again, and gave a small laugh. "Don't mind me, I'm just leaving"

George wasn't even looking at me his face was entirely flushed. I laughed again, genuinely this time.

"See you later George " I said the last to Callie. It implied more then I meant and she picked up on it. I didn't just stake my claim did I?

What the hell, Izzie Stevens, are you doing?

I left the landing and ran straight into Bailey.

"Stevens why aren't you in the pit"

I opened my mouth but she held up her hand and cut me off. "Never mind, I have a new patient for you, someone I'll think you'll like very much" I stared in bewilderment. What the hell is she talking about?

I followed her through the corridors keeping silent as she went on about the patients BP, heart rate everything that was on a patient chart without actually telling me what was wrong with her. We walked into a room and on the bed was a young girl, eleven years old. She was sitting up watching TV through heavily lidded eyes. She was a pretty little thing, long brown hair, olive colored skin and a pair of bewitching brown eyes. There were no parents in sight.

"Uh. Doctor Bailey, where's her parents?"

Bailey stopped by her bed before answering. "They went to get some coffee and ice cream, right Jasmine?"

The young girls eyes flicked in her direction to show she had heard but the sedatives had her almost under. She was fighting to stay awake.

I took my place beside Bailey and stared at her, according to what Bailey told me everything was fine, but if she was under sedatives that kept her heavily drugged most of the time then there was obviously some extensive, painful, damage somewhere.

Bailey's voice was suddenly quiet, the type of voice she reserved for patients she truly felt connected too, or felt some remorse for. It was usually like this around children, especially since she had her little guy. I don't blame her, it's always hard to see a little kid in the hospital, must be harder as a parent.

"You know about infibulations?"

I nodded. "The process of cutting off parts of the female sex, not practiced in America. Well I guess some people do, if you count piercing your downstairs-"I caught myself rambling and stopped before she could give me the glare.

"Her parents took her somewhere, I don't know, and had it done to her. It's a type two so not as extensive as it could have been. There isn't a complete mutilation of her Vagina, but the stitching was done without any antibiotics and her urinary tract has been blocked, causing a back up in urine. Her parents also noticed blood so there could be an infection, or this child has started her menstruations and has blood backed up that could be leaking into her system"

I felt like I had been winded. I looked at the young girl again, then at Bailey, then back at the child. Infibulation?

"Stevens. Stevens, are you listening?"

I focused on Bailey.

"You are a doctor and this child needs some medication I want her ready for surgery in an hour. You're scrubbing in"

I was scrubbing in on an infibulation surgery? On a child?

An older couple sidled through the doors, neither of them held ice cream. And that small fact burned my insides to the core. The little girl didn't respond, her eyelids fluttered and the woman gave a gasping sob. I studied her. She was tiny, frail, with long dark hair that curled over her shoulder. She was clutching her sides and staring at her child. Her husband was a brood man, who stood with his shoulders squared. He didn't look remorseful. He looked annoyed.

"Can't you just clean it and we can go?" he asked gruffly and it took me a moment to realize he _was _annoyed. His little girl was laying in a hospital bed possibly bleeding into her respiratory system and he was _annoyed? _Bailey stared at the man then looked at me.

"Well I have patients to see to. Doctor Stevens here can answer your questions" she looked at me then walked out of the room. I watched her leave. She's leaving me with this mess?

"Well?" he snapped. I looked at him and wanted to run at him with my fists raised and leave him very, very hurt.

"No sir you can't just leave, there are tests we have to go through. There could be internal bleeding and more complication-

"I don't care about these tests, I want it cleaned and then we can go home. This is a waste of time"

I think my mouth hit the floor.

"You're daughter has gone through a procedure, a painful procedure that wasn't done properly _sir _and there's a chance she has an infection, blood and urine seeping through her body. She is a child, your child, and she could die without medical aid" I was breathing hard when I finished and my voice had raised a few octaves. Everyone outside had stopped to look, that stupid nurse always catches me at my bad moments too. He seems to always be there gawking.

I don't think it's possible for this man to get any redder. His face had ballooned in anger and his hands had clenched into fists.

Sloan came breezing in. I rolled my eyes, _what wonderful timing._

"Doctor Stevens can I see you outside please"

I glared but followed. What else could I do?

He stood inches from me, his arms crossed over his chest Very muscular, sexy strong chest and his voice dropped in pitch. It sounded husky, and I almost forgot for a second why we we're standing there. How does Meredith do it? , God, he comes near me and I lose concentration and she loves Mcdreamy. She must blank whenever he walks into a room.

"What are you doing?"

"He wants me to just clean the wound and then let her go"

"Doesn't mean Stevens that you can yell at the patients family"

"They infibulated their own daughter and he's annoyed! He wants her out at the risk of her life! He doesn't care about her, someone has too"

His eyes narrowed and he pointed a finger at me, stabbing the air to make his point.

"I don't care if he walks in here with a damn giraffe on his head demanding we open the halls for a parade, you do not pass judgment, you tell them medical protocol and then you leave and get what you have to get done. Do you understand me?"

I couldn't even look at him anymore. I was back in a place, when I was eleven and my father would come home, drunk, yelling at me not to do something. I was being chastised in front of everyone, it's embarrassing. Especially by Sloan.

His face was suddenly overtaking my senses.

"Do you understand me _Doctor Stevens_?"

I just stared, the blank stare that would drive my father insane. The one stare that anyone can interpret for what they think it means, disinterest, boredom, anger, apathy.

"Go get her charts and get her prepped for surgery. You're out" he visibly shoved himself away from me and into her room to talk the 'traumatized' family out of potentially suing for my attitude.

I was stalking away angrily when a small hand wrapped around my arm. I whirled around and came face to face with the child's mother, the small fragile _thing _that let this happen to her child.

"Please" she whispered. I only glared.

"We love her very much. It is our religion, and we can't ask you to understand it we can only ask that you help where we can't"

I stared into her eyes, the very depths of which were staring back and I felt myself calm.

"Please"

I nodded she gave me a small smile then slipped back into the room.

* * *

I was sitting in the observatory watching Sloan; him again, working on the little girl. The wound was garish in this lighting, then again I don't think it matters what lighting it's in. It's going to be horrible from every angle. The cutting was done with a piece of sharp glass, the wound had been stitched up with a mesh that had the consistency of chicken wire. She was eleven. The plus side, she didn't start her menstruations, the down side was her urine was so backed that it had stretched her urethra and seeped through its walls. She was on chemicals now to get them purged from her system.

George sidled up next to me with Callie. I felt the same stirrings of jealousy.

"I heard Sloan kicked you off the surgery. I'm sorry"

I shrugged and took a sip of my coffee.

"Yah well, I don't think I could have done it anyways"

Callie leaned forward so she could look at me.

"You sure you want to be a Doctor Stevens?"

I glared.

"Hey George can I talk to you for a minute?"

I didn't give him a chance to respond; I stood up and grabbed his arm dragging him behind me. He sputtered an incoherent sentence to Callie and I gave her a small winning smile before I dragged him out the room, down the hallway and to the exit stairs. What am I doing??

George straightened his shirt and brushed at bruises he was claiming were popping up on his skin.

"Jeez Izzie, what's your problem? I bruise easily you know. Ow"

I shoved him against the wall and stopped his whining with my mouth. This felt right. This was what I wanted. What will Callie do now? I have George.

She has a leash without a collar, or her precious puppy.


End file.
